It seems like the last week or so has been full of a lot of “deep thoughts.” (Hee. I know you all remember Jack Handey. If you don’t, humor me, and pretend I’m not THAT old.)
It started with my decision to scan all my old photos–I’ve got shelves and shelves full of photo albums chock full of pictures that are starting to yellow with age. So now, thanks to Flickr where I’ve got serious online storage capacity, I no longer have any need to run for the laptop if the house is on fire. And that’s the main reason I got a bug in my ear about the project, but I found myself completely lost in nostalgia for a couple or three days. Because I wanted to be able to keep the photos organized, I went through the albums sequentially, and it was like perusing through the highlights of my life. I hadn’t really looked at those books much since I got married and had kids. I even had some old journal entries and printed emails in between some of the pages, and reading them was…well, hilarious. (Everything’s so melodramatic when you’re 19. Oy.) But an emotional and very real slice of the past.
A few days later, we headed back to the scene of several of those albums. My SIL graduated from college last December, but BYU doesn’t hold a ceremony until April, so last weekend is when she chose to walk. I hadn’t thought about my previous little nostalgia session in connection with our trip until we got there. Walking back onto BYU campus creates an emotion that’s almost tangible. It’s that strong. I remember my parents going on and on (and on and on) about how fabulous it was to be a student there, and how much they loved the campus, yadda yadda, when I started school. And I did enjoy myself when I was there, though I certainly didn’t take advantage of everything there was to offer.
I think the thing about BYU, though, is that you really don’t get it until you’re gone. Everything is so beautiful. Everything is so clean. There are so many more amenities there than there are at many universities, and especially for the unbelievable price-tag. The campus continues to expand and improve in amazing ways, and yet there’s always a current of quiet stillness underneath the bustle of busy student life (and, sometimes, construction). Honestly? It’s just downright peaceful. It was so wonderful to take the kids around to see the buildings we’d spent so much of our time in, and to have another little visit with nostalgia. Good times.
After our fun-filled and busy weekend, we came back home to what we thought would be the usual grind. Unpacking, laundry, a lawn that needed mowing (yay for spring!), grocery shopping, a tee-ball game, work, homework, etc. Just another normal day in our busy little household. But while I was at the tee-ball game, nearly at the end of that crazy day, my hubby called. To tell me that his raise had come through. His enormous, 40% raise. (Yes! Seriously!) Which we weren’t expecting for another month at least–if, with all the layoffs, it came at all.
I spent a good portion of the rest of the evening alternating between grateful tears, excited bouncing, and shock. Hee. And then deep thought about how we got here: from students who married nearly 8 years ago now, while we were at BYU, to so-called “adults” with two kids of our own. About the home we built, and then weren’t sure we could afford, but how sure we were it had been the right thing to do, because it helped my brother and his family stay afloat during a difficult time. About the crazy and sometimes stupid things we’d had to do, financially, to keep ourselves afloat–and then how my parents simply gave us the money to pay all of that off. About how much my family members have taken care of each other, and how grateful I am for them.
It’s funny how things all work out in the end. Isn’t it? I still can’t think about that without getting a little teary. I’ve spent so much time over the last week thinking about the girl I was, and all the things I wanted in life. I’m nearly 32 years old. Already I have them all. What a lucky girl I am.